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Helping your kids through your divorce

On Behalf of | Nov 25, 2020 | Divorce

It is a simple fact of life that many marriages do not stand the test of time. Divorce is often the best option in many situations, but that doesn’t always mean that it is an easy choice. The two spouses may not be the only parties affected by the split, especially when they share children.

When kids are part of the equation, Texas parents often worry what kind of impact their divorce may have on their lives. These fears aren’t unfounded, but that doesn’t mean they should try to “stick it out” for the children. It is much more important for children to grow up surrounded by as much love and stability as possible. If you’re concerned about how your divorce may affect your kids, experts have plenty of advice to help you through this event.

How to tell children about the divorce

You may wonder if there is a right time and way to tell children about your divorce, but the truth is that there is no hard-and-fast rule. Still, telling all children at the same time can help avoid resentment or hurt feelings. Though kids of different age groups will have different concerns, you can address them in private, personal conversations after the initial announcement. The timing can be tricky, as the divorce process takes considerable time, but it is probably best to inform children before the actual filing.

Dealing with children’s reactions

Some children may mistakenly believe they caused the divorce, so you may want to reassure them that this is not the case. Kids may not understand that some marriages simply don’t last. Whenever possible, try to maintain the schedule and activities that kids are already accustomed to, so they experience the least amount of disruption to their lives as possible.

Helping your children post-divorce

As you and your ex make choices about your children’s lives, it is fine to keep your kids updated. It’s understandable that you wouldn’t know those details immediately, but telling your kids when you do can help them feel more stable. Involving a therapist in this discussion may help, too, especially if you and your ex have co-parenting disagreements. Even if matters are contentious between you and your ex, avoid talking negatively about him or her to your children, and ask other family members and friends to do the same.

One of the best ways to help children through divorce is to help yourself through the process as well. Working with an experienced family law attorney may be the best choice for everyone involved. A legal professional can help you consider your priorities and aid you and your family through this time of transition.